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Tomorrow will mark a year since I found out that I wasn’t being offered a permanent contract at the job I loved since last May, and I’m still no closer to being on any kind of  career pathway. I’ve had my fill of bog standard jobs over the years, and now I want to try and establish a life for myself.

Some time ago, I came to the decision that motherhood was not going to be an option for me. I’m the youngest of 5  – 1 brother who has a daughter and 3 sisters – who each have 4 children and grandchildren! I’m fast approaching my late 30s and would rather try and build a career now. Having a child now would effectively mean my career would be over before it had even begun.

I want my beautiful little 2 – bedroom flat with the floor – to ceiling windows and the laminate floors. I want to go shopping at Ikea for cute little knick-knacks, go to Bikram Yoga twice a week, sip Porn Star Martinis at the highest point in the city over the weekend, go on holiday twice a year, head to London for the odd weekend.

But how do I get there? I honestly (naïvely?) thought that as a mature graduate, job offers would be coming at me left, right and centre. But instead, I’m lucky to get a “thanks but no thanks” email. Three times in a row, I’ve taken the time to fill in job applications, to then be told that they were no longer recruiting! The irony is, I left a reasonably good job to move to university. It might not have been enough to get me my 2 – bed flat, but I certainly could have had my fair share of Porn Star Martinis! In spite of my achievements, part of me wishes that I’d never gone to uni. Sigh.

But this too will pass. In time, I’ll get out of this funk and look onward and upward! In some more time, I’ll get myself a job and make a late start on building my dreams.

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