I set myself a few ground rules when I set up my Seeking Arrangement account, but in order to faciliate contact between myself and potential SDs, I ended up “relaxing” them. Huge mistake. After the experience I had with one particular guy on SA (R), my rules will be set in stone from now on.

Of course, it’s vitally important for both SBs and SDs to clearly state their expectations early on in the conversation. However I feel it’s also very important for both parties to listen to each other. (in R’s case, to actually read what I’d typed 3 days earlier and taken that information in/kept hold of the information so he could refer to it. This would minimise the risk of conversations like this happening:

R: So, do you like white guys?

Me: Yes, most guys I’ve dated were white.

* A few days later….*

R: Do you like white guys?

Me (being diplomatic): Yes.

R: Have you ever been with one before?

Me: 8-/

And so it continued…

For various reasons that I won’t go into here, I decided that R and I wouldn’t be compatible. Before I could wish him luck, he made a “very, very generous monthly arrangement offer”! Well, when I say he made an offer, it was more like, “Oh, so £2000 per month tax free wouldn’t be of interest to you?”

For what he wanted, £20,000 per month tax free wouldn’t be of interest to me.

I’m sure there’s someone else in the sugar bowl who will be happy to give R what he wants.

Unfortunately for him, it won’t be me. Best of luck R.